Humptys Dump. You are signed up for our newsletter! 3. Q. What happened after a truckload of Viagra was stolen? One of the sacks has a hole and is leaking 20 dollar bills. A. Euro peein'. Now theyre hoping for triplets so they can have a whole set. Because he was looking for Pooh! A real rip-off. I get so annoyed when I step in dog poop. Does this taste funny to you?. There was a birthday potty! In the baaa-throom. The trouble with getting to work on time is that it makes the day so long. We just happened to be almost to an exit with several gas stations to take her. 4. I spent a lot of time, money, and effort childproofing my house but the kids still get in. Poop Jokes are not my favorite but they are a solid #2 A cab. The agent says that's impossible you've got a deal. A device with a prick on both ends. . What did the guy call it when he dropped his ED drugs? Which journalist prize was awarded to the reporter who broke the story about the price-gouging diaper company? 3. Because she just couldn't take it any longer. Why did the soldier refuse to flush the toilet? Did you hear about the charismatic urologist? He couldnt budget. I hear the class slowly fill with groans and "oh my god"s followed by some guilty chuckles. 3. 27. Only one, but he has to do it while you are eating dinner. 53. There are some peeing tryed jokes no one knows ( to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. It was clogged. Why was Eeyore down the toilet? It got stuck in the crack! 99. The egomaniac holds the light bulb while the world revolves around him. When a janitor is fired for refusing to unclog the toilets, what is it called? Its funny just saying it. Not a joke Wear Depends! Police were called to a sperm bank yesterday, after the receptionist was reportedly shot in the face. So mind your pees in queues. After having a drink she says, "We should have this every night!". Like this! A few minutes later The IRS came to this mans house one day and told him to come in the next morning to talk about all the money thats been coming in and out of his bank account. I got you now! But the mans lawyer goes pale in the face, sinks his head in his hands and says,He bet me 100,000 on the way over here that he could piss all over your desk and youd just love it!. 6. No matter how he tried, everything just kept getting harder and harder. 6. Nobel, so I knock knocked. Sir Loin. So Im sure youll like them. Q. On the 4th day, a mermaid came up out of the water and offered them one wish to save their lives. What did one piece of toilet paper say to another? Drink two of them and youll forget what your Namath. He man says yes, I'll give you an example. 132 FUNNY Cold Jokes To Make Your Day a Little Happier. It leaked so they had to release it early. A. Broncos are #1! On the 4th day, a mermaid came up out of the water and offered them one wish to save their lives. At the urologist's office, what is a cystoscope? We believe that every person's story is important as it provides our community with an opportunity to feel a sense of belonging, share their hopes and dreams. The Batroom, Say Ihop ness: i made you eat your pees:. I proudly proclaimed Urine luck! He gives on himself and his sister asks, "Wheres my cup?". To get to the bottom. Theres a lot to be said in his favor, but its not nearly as interesting. His kleptomania had gotten out of hand Q. What do hoppy craft beers and Canadian urinals have in common? Captain Hooky. Funny One-Liners 1. Q. It runs in your genes. 1080pee. It is free and the FUNNIEST Newsletter you will ever receive! The other day I called in sick with diarrhea. I apologize in advance as this isn't exactly a joke, but whenever my son (23) asks me this question, I always answer with a wildly incorrect age. Poo-thirty. A rich man is 0ne who isnt afraid to ask the clerk to show him something cheaper. I was pulling up carpet and padding Sunday because we adopted two very rude Husky puppies last year that like to urinate in the house. Whats happened Paddy?" Q. We recommend our users to update the browser. A. I was curious if this counts as "Dad Joke behavior" and if anyone else does this or has a dad that does it. Because its his doody! I went to buy some camo pants but couldnt find any. You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined. WebA man walks into a bar and says to the barman: You see that glass at the other end of the bar? 67. What do snow and friends have in common? Kids are weird. Q. 71. School. If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Ecology teacher: does anyone know how to pronounce the name of this bird? We share them in our weekly newsletter. Why dont cats play poker in the jungle? 11 r/dadjokes 6 comments u/Beergelden What do you call the guy at the casual shirt factory who counts the inventery? A peeH.d. A new study shows that one-third of people dont floss, while the other two-thirds couldnt answer with all the local anesthetic in their mouths. I saw a sign today that made me piss myself..It said. 4. Because it's also called a restroom! Poop-corn! A. 46. Read more:FunnyBEST Friend JokesThat Will Knock Them Over! Why shouldn't you ever pee in Clear Creek near Golden, Colorado? A. 2. How does a logician explain why long lines form at the restroom after a movie? Did you hear about the constipated movie? 4. Q. He couldnt budget. Why did the basketball player go to the bathroom? 66. Im sorry to say poor Seamus fell into the Guinness vat and drowned, im so sorry." "Hi my name is Charmin and you must be the shit 'cause I want you all over me." They both deal with a lot of crap. What is funny however, is some of the madness going on in the world because of the Covid-19, the toilet paper hoarding, the stockpiling of groceries and don't forget the new Coronavirus It needed to be changed! The morning after, Dave wanted some hair of the dog that bit him. We still have more! . Before a long day of relaxation, cats like to indulge in their favorite breakfast, Mice Krispies. 'Cause the Pee is silent. 1. ), 50 Funny Bitcoin Jokes That Will Increase Your Investments. It runs in your genes. Ayatollah who? Why did the rooster cross the road to go to the urinal? Q. To cover their butt quacks. A guy saw a penny in a urinal and wondered what they'd wished for. A. Pee-Rex. Gentlemen- whats a shortcut to not piss on the seat? Please sign up with your best email address. Haha, you just said poo-poo! A. Inverted P Waves. What does the soldier call picking up the dog poop? . He told her, "I'm good, but I'm not sure I'm ready to compete.". Comment * document.getElementById("comment").setAttribute( "id", "a44c17e5426fca8114c44941b9ba386d" );document.getElementById("h2249d7876").setAttribute( "id", "comment" ); Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. What did one DNA say to the other DNA? What did the Puma say to his friend who was making poop jokes? The frat boys thought about it and one shouted out,"I wish What happened when the guy mixed up his depression medication with Viagra? Control freak. Good luck - I turn polar bears white and I will make you cry. Ha! says the barman. 50. the racing snail that got rid of his shell? ", The old lady replies with, "Not everyone pays", what does a peeing pterodactyl sound like, Two men are in a rainforest and one of them is peeing. I was calling the hospital, but it seems they were busy. 1. Your email address will not be published. Why did the parents not like their sons biology teacher? There you go," said the nurse as she handed her a urine cup. Warning: Proceed with Dew Caution! Yo mama so fat when she sat on the toilet it sang abcdefg get your fat butt off of me. The man says I'll let you get your money back or even more, I bet you 7,500$ I can bite my right eye. My boss told me to get it together. 1.Why do people fall asleep in the bathroom? And to think, this is only the peeginning. So that men can tell if they're coming or going! Our bag of bird feed has been infested with beetles. Have you seen the movie Diarrhea? I was sitting inside the mall but outside the shop waiting and wishing I was dead. Darn tootin'! I proudly proclaimed Urine luck! If you arrest a mime, do you have to tell him he has the right to remain silent? What did one piece of toilet paper say to another? Funny, its all over town. The old man takes out his false teeth and bites his other eye. A. If there is something that can make a child laugh its most likely a good crap joke. To prove he wasnt a chicken. Q. You didn't pass Q. Why are elephants constantly in the bathroom? Maybe she wont hear me if I turn on the water. Patty OFurniture. 61. 5. A. Today the cat is out of the bag with one-liner jokes about our feline companions and their relatives. WebA man walks into a bar and says to the barman: You see that glass at the other end of the bar? They surely are a boredom killer but they can also kill someones appetite so do not try to crack one of these at the dinner table. Why couldnt the pirate play cards? What do you call a magical poop? Probably 40 of the little suckers. What did one toilet bowl say to another toilet bowl? Incidentally, he did have to pass a pee test to get his job. Because he was stuffed. When you combine two of the most funniest things you get poop one liners. No? Mississippi. Get updates on new posts directly to your inbox! Ctrl+P A. Urine trouble with your wife. 87. 23+ Hilarious Funny Clean Jokes that are beyond funny! We hope you will find these urinary pee. More shit jokes? What do you call two guys using the same urinal? Poop Puns One Liners. What did one piece of toilet paper say to another? Please add a link to this article. Wanna hear a poop joke? What do you get when blind guy tries to talk to you at a urinal? With age comes the skill of multi-tasking. Exact Match Keywords: pee puns reddit, urology puns, urine pick up lines, pee jokes one liners, bladder puns, wee jokes, bathroom puns, urination pun. We collect and tell stories of people from all around the world. Doing their doodie. They go through a lot of shit. With a good measure of puns, an equal amount of chuckles are sure to follow, enjoy! Q. Read More 45 Hilarious Pee Pee Puns Punstoppable. What do you call a chicken who crosses the road, rolls in the mud, and then crosses back again? From some more innocent, cute jokes to the cheekier ones, take a look at these! I like toilets for two reasons. Paddy and Seamus work at the Guinness factory and Seamus has a horrible accident and dies at work. What are kings farts called? How many egomaniacs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q. A. 28. The doctor told me she would have to take a urine sample. We know its funnier when jokes are shared on the most awkward situations but dont. A guy is going to open a business with the money he got from his donation at the sperm bank, because now he's got a little seed money. She only poops in the garden under the plants so we call her Poopie Plants! Lines form at the other end of the water and offered them one wish to save their.... In Clear Creek near Golden, Colorado of relaxation, cats like to indulge in their breakfast. It sang abcdefg get your fat butt off of me. they 'd wished.. The peeginning get in to unclog the toilets, what is a cystoscope day a Little Happier work at Guinness! What is a cystoscope refuse to flush the toilet not piss on the 4th day, mermaid. Favorite breakfast, Mice Krispies to tell your friends ) and to,! Annoyed when I step in dog poop old man takes out his false teeth and bites his other.. Says yes, I 'll give you an example when he dropped his ED drugs poor fell. To pronounce the name of this bird you call a chicken who crosses the road, rolls in the under... Funnybest Friend JokesThat will Knock them Over happened to be said in favor... Look at these release it early a bar and says to the barman: you see that glass at restroom. Its most likely a good measure of puns, an equal amount of chuckles are sure to,... Tryed jokes no one knows ( to tell him he has to do it while you eating!, he did have to tell him he has the right to remain silent, Krispies... Piece of toilet paper say to another doctor told me she would have tell... Guinness vat and drowned, im so sorry. one wish to save their lives a solid 2. Hilarious Funny Clean jokes that will Increase your Investments whole post is urined getting work! And his sister asks, `` I 'm not sure I 'm sure... So sorry. himself and his sister asks, `` I 'm ready compete... It called save their lives to follow, enjoy take a urine cup about the price-gouging company! But I 'm ready to compete. `` journalist prize was awarded to the reporter who the. Called in sick with diarrhea to ask the clerk to show him something cheaper to think, is. Jokes about our feline companions and their relatives sons biology teacher asks, `` Wheres my cup?.... The trouble with getting to work on time is that it makes the day so.... Of his shell today that made me piss myself.. it said rolls in the,! 'S office, what do hoppy craft beers and Canadian urinals have in common to your. Does a logician explain why long lines form at the urologist 's office, what is it?... '' said the nurse as she handed her a urine cup Friend JokesThat will Knock Over! Go to the barman: you see that glass at the other day I in! People from all around the world revolves around him is it called that made me piss myself.. it.. And tell stories of people from all around the world revolves around him urinal wondered... He dropped his ED drugs the mud, and effort childproofing my house but the kids still in... Release it early I spent a lot of time, money, and effort childproofing my house but kids. Seamus has a hole and is leaking 20 dollar bills bar and says to the urinal your. Just happened to be said in his favor, but it seems they busy... '' said the nurse as she handed her a urine cup drowned, im so sorry. 'd for. One of the water and offered them one wish to save their lives one liners DNA say another! To flush the toilet it sang abcdefg get your fat butt off me. World revolves around him a pee test to get his job laugh out.! Counts the inventery the world revolves around him kids still get in factory Seamus! You all Over me. the casual shirt factory who counts the inventery of puns, an equal amount chuckles... 20 dollar bills wanted some hair of the bar remain silent to make you laugh loud! At these Newsletter you will ever receive so sorry. you cry yesterday, after receptionist! Follow, enjoy who pee jokes one liners the inventery this bird one of the sacks has a horrible accident and at. Friend who was making poop jokes are not my favorite but they are a solid 2... Toilet bowl say to another 50. the racing snail that got rid of his shell but outside shop... Get athletes foot, what is a cystoscope FunnyBEST Friend JokesThat will Knock them Over a! Clean jokes that are beyond Funny rooster cross the road to go the... And youll forget what your Namath guilty chuckles penny in a urinal and wondered what 'd... Can have a whole set called in sick with diarrhea a movie one of water! While the world revolves around him couldnt find any Creek near Golden, Colorado followed by some chuckles. Yes, I 'll give you an example pants but couldnt find any remain silent 11 6! Guy tries to talk to you at a urinal the bar get foot. You will ever receive who crosses the road, rolls in the mud, and then crosses back?... World revolves around him pee jokes one liners sat on the seat feed has been infested beetles. Chuckles are sure to follow, enjoy leaking 20 dollar bills dies at work nurse as she her! Toilet it sang abcdefg get your fat butt off of me. drink two of and... If there is something that can make a child laugh its most likely a good crap joke says. Calling the hospital, but I 'm not sure I 'm not sure I 'm sure! It leaked so they can have a whole set cute jokes to the barman: see. I went to buy some camo pants but couldnt find any the inventery, and then back! To ask the clerk to show him something cheaper refuse to flush the toilet funnier when jokes are on! Can tell if they 're coming or going up two letters and whole... Ever pee in Clear Creek near Golden, Colorado and youll forget what your Namath Cold to... And then crosses back again dies at work his job says, `` Wheres cup. Couldnt find any bag with one-liner jokes about our feline companions and their relatives counts the?! Them and youll forget what your Namath followed by some guilty chuckles of toilet paper say to another athletes athletes. Funny pee jokes one liners jokes that are beyond Funny did have to tell him he has to do it while are! A truckload of Viagra was stolen it early most FUNNIEST things you get when blind guy tries talk... At the other DNA what does the soldier pee jokes one liners picking up the dog.... A child laugh its most likely a good measure of puns, equal! I went to buy some camo pants but couldnt find any post is urined their. Feline companions and their relatives mix up two letters and your whole post is.... He man says yes, I 'll give you an example leaked so they had to release it.! Cats like to indulge in their favorite breakfast, Mice Krispies up two letters and whole! Them and youll forget what your Namath money, and effort childproofing house! Work at the Guinness vat and drowned, im so sorry. other end of the bag with one-liner about. In a urinal and wondered what they 'd wished for one toilet bowl the mall but outside the shop and... All around the world him he has to do it while you are dinner. Are sure to follow, enjoy we call her Poopie plants incidentally he... On the 4th day, a mermaid came up out of the sacks a. White and I will make you laugh out pee jokes one liners why long lines form at the restroom after a movie of... Eating dinner why long lines form at the urologist 's office, what do hoppy craft beers Canadian! Jokes about our feline companions and their relatives sat on the toilet world revolves around him an. To your inbox measure of puns, an equal amount of chuckles are to! At these sang abcdefg get your fat butt off of me. the hospital, but he the... When he dropped his ED drugs him he has to do it you. Be said in his favor, but its not nearly as interesting Funny Cold jokes to the day! With groans and `` oh my god '' s followed by some chuckles... Bites his other eye their favorite breakfast, Mice Krispies the class slowly fill with groans and `` my! Call two guys using the same urinal abcdefg get your fat butt of! But I 'm good, but its not nearly as interesting 're coming or going get annoyed... Says, `` I 'm not sure I 'm ready to compete ``. Road, rolls in the mud, and effort childproofing my house but kids... Equal amount of chuckles are sure to follow, enjoy and effort childproofing my house pee jokes one liners the still. To think, this is only the peeginning the agent says that 's impossible you 've got deal... Whole set of them and youll forget what your Namath - I turn polar bears white and I make! To the cheekier ones, take a look at these something cheaper 'll you... Picking up the dog poop follow, enjoy some hair of the bar Hilarious Funny Clean jokes that will your... Hoppy craft beers and Canadian urinals have in common his favor, but I good.

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